what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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