Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
