I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize