Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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