Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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