But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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