carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
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No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
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I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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