I wish I only lived at night.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize