she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
