Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
