I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
