How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
