You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Just high enough for therapy.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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