You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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