Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
another moral hangover. fuck.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
