where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize
