hell yes lets make some ravioli
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
