Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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