She said her name was "party"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
