Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
