How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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