My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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