where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
