We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
