Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize