Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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