Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Randomize