Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  this is mike. we're done.

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  (917): I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike (1-917): this is mike. we're done. http://tfl.nu/abns
  Replies (21) Good night (815) Bad night (2946)
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  (323): View more from California

  Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!

  (206): View more from Washington

  Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...

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  (323): Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people! (206): Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003... http://tfl.nu/95ks
  Replies (38) Good night (924) Bad night (2329)
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  (310): View more from California

  Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..

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  (310): Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand.. http://tfl.nu/3e9c
  Replies (28) Good night (1197) Bad night (5852)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...

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  (817): So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain... http://tfl.nu/gzma
  Replies (27) Good night (1091) Bad night (4233)
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  (510): View more from California

  You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.

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  (510): You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen. http://tfl.nu/ldf9
  Replies (20) Good night (1200) Bad night (7413)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.

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  (602): So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better. http://tfl.nu/qcgw
  Replies (79) Good night (4005) Bad night (7712)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.

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  (703): I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going. http://tfl.nu/roti
  Replies (45) Good night (1939) Bad night (4915)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions

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  (770): The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions http://tfl.nu/csf1
  Replies (11) Good night (5805) Bad night (914)
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  (+54): View more from

  look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.

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  (+54): look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels. http://tfl.nu/ux1z
  Replies (11) Good night (7242) Bad night (927)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today

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  (+61): I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today http://tfl.nu/nnzy
  Replies (3) Good night (1925) Bad night (737)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  was I really that bad?

  (616): View more from Michigan

  you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage

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  (231): was I really that bad? (616): you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage http://tfl.nu/4ubm
  Replies (1) Good night (694) Bad night (361)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.

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  (208): I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook. http://tfl.nu/vmgg
  Replies (1) Good night (274) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?

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  (781): In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex? http://tfl.nu/6zay
  Replies (9) Good night (490) Bad night (897)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?

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  (304): Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis? http://tfl.nu/2x4t
  Replies (6) Good night (820) Bad night (226)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make

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  (480): It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make http://tfl.nu/me5f
  Replies (2) Good night (479) Bad night (260)

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