Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

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(434): View more from Virginia

There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.

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(740): View more from Ohio

his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass

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(732): View more from New Jersey

It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(410): View more from Maryland

I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.

(1-612): View more from Minnesota

I will rub McFlurries all over you.

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(+81): View more from

When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.

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