I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Can I color on your dick again?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
