I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
