ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
