Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
