All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
My balls are so social today.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Randomize
