Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
