What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
i need some magic done to my vagina
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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