Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong