Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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