when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
