u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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