is your mom at the bar?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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