MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
