I wanna bring you to show and tell
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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