Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Can you bring me the toilet please
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
