Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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