i was born a porn star she said
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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