his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize