is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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