Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize