omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
splinters make it hard to masturbate
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
What a dumb baby whore.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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