Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Never joke about your clitoris.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize