I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
